Day 33 – from Jamie – a new low!

33 days at sea and the relentless strain on our minds and bodies is now very obvious to the eye. the pain from the sores on our bums has reached new levels. I’ve just had to sit on an infected sore for 2 hours whilst the waves sway me from side to side spreading and stretching the skin again and again and again. it is incredibly unnatural putting yourself through the agony we are when relief could come in the form of lying on our fronts. however, this is not an option for us as it would lead to a slacking in discipline which is unacceptable given the circumstances. worse though than the sores are our testicles. a rash has completely covered mine and when they come into contact with anything other than air, they give off a burning sensation that spreads. other than my new invention – the Cocksock, I’m utterly helpless. the cure from this pain is simple, but it is the one thing we do not have the luxury of. I’m talking about rest.

if 10 is burning yourself on a kettle then I’m constantly on 6 and it can reach 8 for a matter of hours at a time.

my mind has had to endure more than it ever has before and it will likely ever have to (maybe). the only comfort comes in knowing that within 21 days, hopefully 19, we will have reached the end of this life altering voyage. things that once seemed hard will appear manageable, and tasks that all look upon as impossible, i will pursue. Why will this happen? when you push yourself as far out of your comfort zone as i have, there lies little outside of it still.

my two ipods have both broken (my fault and certainly not my fault). only the one my dad gave me remains, and having listened to the simple minds album over 15 times and exhausted the audiobook library, i have nothing to stimulate me on our long long long shifts.

my hands our as tough as sand paper and beyond being able to bleed. Luke complained when i applied sun lotion to his back yesterday. the 45 degree Celsius cabin is becoming more and more unbearable as we head south. we have had to take to the deck during the day in hope of catching a few minutes sleep. of course we never do, this would be to easy.

I’ve learnt a lot about myself over the past weeks. for one, and to my surprise, i’m actually a tough, disciplined bastard, and when the going gets tough, i bloody get going. this is not to say that i haven’t broken down and sobbed a handful of times.

when my mind wonders i think of the following in great depth.

– girls (past, present) mistakes i’ve made, mistakes they’ve made (lots hah)

-motorbikes (future trips)

– career paths (there are 3 options)

– Next adventures (there are 3 i will have hopefully completed within the next 4 years).

– my family and extended family

– the two dachshund puppies we are to get on my return

– Antigua

– Antigua

living abnormally like we do out here has made me certain how a normal life and career is so not going to be the way for me. that’s not to say i look down upon those who will choose these routes, far from it in fact, but it has been made clear to me that I’m not suited to it. i write arrogantly i think, constantly talking about me and my thoughts and my feelings, but I’ve just spent so much bloody time with myself that i can’t thing about anything else!

I am feeling low at the moment. i do get this way sometimes, even in normal life. to quote my mother from a letter she wrote me ‘… you have always had the ability to feel very strongly. this as well as being a blessing can be a curse, as i know you can get very low sometimes. however, take comfort in knowing that you can and will (very shortly) feel incredibly high’. she is so right and i miss her along with dad and kit and rose beyond belief.

I’m currently lying in a pool of sweat on a roll mat. this means that when the boat gets thrown from side to side, i slide from left to right smashing into the cabin walls. my chicken korma with rice has rehydrated now so I’m going to tuck in.

I’m forever thankful for your support and i feel i must apologise for these ramblings but you’ll have to excuse me as I’m delirious. J

13 Comments

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  • Reply

    Ellie Wade

    5 months ago

    I often think about you guys and I am in awe!
    You battle on and make incredible progress despite the weather conditions, the pain and dehydrated food…yuk!
    We have toasted your progress with many a glass of wine with many people over the weeks you have been away. Everyone is amazed and humbled by what you are achieving, and wish you every success.
    Please stay sane… the world needs you both to sort out world peace when you get back. Use this time to think how it’s to be done.
    Keep going!
    Every best wish
    Ellie x

  • Reply

    Charlie Milne

    5 months ago

    Immensely proud of you. Hang in there you stubborn bastard. Love Charlie

  • Reply

    Jann Neilson

    5 months ago

    Admiration and respect for you both – and you have exceeded your fund raising target, congratulations on so many levels.

  • Reply

    Angela Feather

    5 months ago

    You both are amazing. It must be so tough. How you have made such fantastic progress under those conditions I cannot imagine but you have. You have enormous stamina and courage and are an example to us all. Every good wish. Angela (Feather)

  • Reply

    anne macalpine-leny

    5 months ago

    to you both–fair winds and following seas. how it must have been to ‘be at sea’ in the early days of seafaring travel–i think you are experiencing it first hand. thousands of years gone by–pioneers and legends all in one. just imagine the strength stamina and inquisitiveness of those early explorers–maybe only going short distances at a time in the beginning but then finally finding that the sea could be a friend and finding that friendship. my family has a long and fruitful relationship with the sea. my father had a battleship underneath him, my brothers destroyers and submarines and my nieces and nephew spend more time thinking about the interface of space and the sea than the ship underneath them. times change. the one thing that is constant is the respect and the friendship we find in the sea–however that is inspired. keep strong, look for the light and the friendship. and no doubt you have mariners from the past to guide you on your path.

  • Reply

    Henry Stevens

    5 months ago

    Thinking of you guys in awe and admiration. Think of the tales you’ll tell your kids and grand kids. The whole of UK is behind you. Fondest “h”

  • Reply

    Paul Lucas

    5 months ago

    Hang in there—-nearly over !!!

  • Reply

    Katie Macdonald

    5 months ago

    Keep going and dreaming of those cocktails on the beach and lying on your front for weeks when you get to Antigua! Amazing what you are doing! Row on!!

  • Reply

    Charlotte and Reggie Tyrwhitt

    5 months ago

    We have been following your extraordinary journey from the start. Having seen you both and your tiny boat at Doddington and enjoyed the jollity of that evening in September, it now seems that you are as far away from there as is possible. You have been in our thoughts every day especially over Christmas and your courage is extraordinary. You have smashed the half way barrier and will soon be home. Keep going boys. You have SO many people willing you on.
    Happy New Year!

  • Reply

    Stewart Sether

    5 months ago

    Be strong, keep going, you only have a few days left and then you will be on a tremendous high for a very long time. Be proud, the pair of you are absolutely amazing!

    Jamie happy birthday for tomorrow

    best wishes from Stewart, Susan and the kids

  • Reply

    Nathan

    5 months ago

    Discovering about and stumbling across the Talisker Whisky Atlantic challenge, through a work colleague as she mentioned her son was in the race. I’ve been hooked completely by the race ever since, following the race updates and blogs. You guys are doing something extraordinary, battling your own personal demons as the days progress, physically, mentally and emotionally, in order to fulfil an ambition and raise money for an amazing cause. That guys deserves a huge pat on the back !! A reminder to you both, when morale is low, when you feel defeated and spirits are low. Just remember you’re in this together, you have each other and nobody can take away your accomplishments from you. You’re not alone in the challenge, there’s plenty of support behind you all. With every stoke of those oars, you’re one step closer to Antigua, completing the task you set out to accomplish. Pain is only temporary guys, but memories last a lifetime, embrace it and row hard ! You’ve already completed one goal in raising over £150,000, and you’re about to make history with a world record, for the youngest rowers to cross the Atlantic in pairs.

  • Reply

    Angie Lopez

    5 months ago

    Families and friends arriving in Antigua to welcome you in a few days… How very exciting is that!!!! Still a bit more to go boys but nearly there… Keep up ! You are about to break a world record… Your strength is inspiring. Best wishes, Angie

  • Reply

    Jenny

    5 months ago

    Will miss your blogs…you made me laugh and cry……and your amazing insight demonstrated the benefits of allowing yourself time to reflect. If one of your three career paths is becoming a life coach please let me know!

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